10st 5, 10st 4, 10st 5, 10st 7, 10st 3, new scales different each time you stand on them.

10.30 a.m Terrible night. Woken in middle of night by strange buzzing sound in bedroom. Thought it was C. snoring and kicked him but bed was empty – he was in spare room again. Ended up hunting manically through room tossing underwear out of drawers until eventually found source of noise underneath bath salts in decorative box (present from the Enderbys, sure I saw it in tombola at WI Summer Fayre). It was the mobile phone James gave me for Christmas, despite my making it perfectly clear that what I really wanted was a voucher for Harvey Nicks (even James hopeless at choosing presents like all men). Thrust it into the linen hamper and eventually managed to get back to sleep. Must get some coffee and try to wake up.

18.27 Have just cancelled dinner date with Colin – Thursday is our regular night out, but I feel absolutely drained following sleepless night and harrowing phonecall with Audrey. C. said ‘oh good, now I can watch my video of England winning the Ashes.’ Have retreated to dining room to mull over Audrey’s remarks. Apparently both she and Una are worried because, and I quote, ‘alcohol is freely available in Albufeira.’ I said personally I only ever had a single small sherry but if she and Una had trouble with their self control then I really couldn’t help them with it. Audrey said she thought the best thing was if we all agreed to be teetotal, so naturally I agreed – wouldn’t want the poor things to struggle.